Recovering from “Bad Touches”

For years the terms “bad touches” and “good touches” have been used to educate children about how to be aware and avoid a perpetrator of abuse. Yet, what happens after a “bad touch” occurs and the child is left trying to determine if there even is such a thing as a “good touch”?

Do not be surprised if a child that you know or even love pulls away when you attempt to hug, rub their arm, or even tousle their hair. For a traumatized child, every touch is a bad one, and safety and security must be relearned.

Even adults who are trauma survivors can have difficulty with receiving and expressing affection. I believe the best way to gain someone’s trust, whether it be a child or an adult, is by giving them words of affirmation. Telling them they are loved and why will go a long way towards earning the result of getting a hug or an affectionate smile.