Every type of trauma has shame at its core. In this piece, I will specifically address emotional shame and its consequences. Imagine being a child who is an extremely gifted artist. At school, you are given endless praise by your friends and teachers for the beautiful things you draw and create.
But when you go home, you are belittled, discounted, rejected, and even told that your poor sibling is hurt by the fact that you are better at art than her. Inside, you begin to get all these mixed messages, and finally after a few years, deep shame results. You begin to regret and feel guilty for your talents, and self-loathing starts to settle in your very core.
A child who grows up being told that he or she will “amount to nothing” will have many hills to climb as both a teenager and an adult. It takes a gifted therapist to work with the remnants of shame-raised individuals to help them find wholeness and healing. If you are dealing with shame from your early years, in addition to being a good therapist, I would recommend expressing gratitude daily. Focusing on the positive can really make a difference in the healing journey.